Monday, December 17, 2012

Simple Acts... or...the significance of hexagonal metal


As I was leaving my son’s elementary school this morning, I passed the custodian standing by the front door holding his ring of keys. In his hand he held the simple allen wrench used to lock the front door.  When the weather is nice, they prop it open while kids and parents file in, then close it at 8:00.  When the weather is cold, they leave it unlocked till 8:00, then lock it and only allow entrance after you have buzzed in for permission on the intercom.

I could see in the custodian’s face and I could feel in my heart that this task – setting the lock on the door – took on much greater significance this Monday morning.  I wanted to tell him “thank you” for this small action he was doing for the thousandth time.  This morning as I walked down the halls to leave the school, I saw teachers testing the locks on their classroom doors. I wanted to thank them as well, for thinking of the safety of children, mine and others, a hundred times a day in a hundred different ways.  For the tears they dry, the scraped knees they bandage, the fears they soothe. 

Last Friday in Connecticut, incredible acts of heroism were performed.  A principal, vice principal and a school psychologist left a meeting to confront a danger and risked everything. Two of the three lost all.  A teacher hid children and lost her life protecting them. Another died trying to shield her students with her own body.  Another hid with her students and kept them safe from harm and showed them love and kindness in the greatest moment of need in their young lives.  Yet another was simply serving as a substitute for a teacher on maternity leave and died in her place.  

Dawn Hochsprung, Mary Sherlach, Natalie Hammond, Victoria Soto, Anne Marie Murphy, Rachel D’Avino, Lauren Rousseau, Janet Vollmer, Kristen Roig. These are the names that should be remembered, repeated and cherished. These women, most of whom did not survive their ordeal, should be the subject of our conversation, the focus of our thoughts.

The other name should have no notoriety, no infamy.  His actions were monstrous.  They defy the label “crimes.” They cannot and should not be ignored, for they can instruct us that some in our community carry within their souls such howling pain and darkness that their very humanity is at risk. But he must not be glamorized or made the focus of our attention no matter how tempting that may be.

I must admit this tidal wave of unspeakable violence has threatened to swamp me. I have a child the age of these victims.  I spent the weekend going to Christmas programs and parties and seeing the promise and talent of the future residing in young bodies and echoing in their voices. I could not keep from imagining what it would be like to see darkness stride confidently through the door and snuff out their light. I must not let those thoughts fester.

I saw the movie Cloud Atlas earlier this year.  A character in that tale spoke a wisdom that keeps returning to my thoughts these days.  “Our lives are not our own. We are bound to others, past and present, and by each crime and every kindness, we birth our future.”

By each crime and every kindness, we birth our future.  We can debate issues and policies, but ultimately, that is all we have to guide our response.

I have friends who have lost children suddenly to a car accident and slowly to disease. The loss of a child is always devastating and heartbreaking for it contains within it all the future that should have been and now never will be. Events like last Friday force us all to face the fact that despite our best efforts and sincere promises, we cannot guarantee our children the safety we pledge to deliver. Yet we can, by each kindness, to loved ones and strangers alike, birth within their worlds, in those small moments the kind of future we desire for all our children.

All we have in our hands is a small bit of metal - a simple key on a ring. We can do kindness.  Wherever we are. At all times. To everyone. Despite the knowledge that there is evil in the world that may someday leave us all undone, let us each do kindness.